Our fostering community 

Connie and Jatinder's story

Meet Connie and Jatinder – they hadn’t planned to become foster carers, but when a friend of their son’s needed a safe place to stay, they stepped in. Now, nearly three years on, they’re fostering older children and sharing their journey – the unexpected beginning, the proudest moments, and the difference fostering has made to their lives.

“We hadn’t planned on becoming foster carers - it just happened. One day, a friend of our son’s needed help and a place to stay after things broke down at home. He had been sofa-surfing for five weeks and had seen things no young person should. We agreed to let him stay for a few nights and reached out to social services. When it became clear that his only option might be a residential home that wouldn’t meet his additional needs, we decided he could stay with us for as long as he needed as kinship carers. It wasn’t really a decision; it simply felt right. We could see the potential in this young person, knew we could make a difference, and just couldn’t stand by and watch him get lost in the system. Teen placements are rare, and we knew that if we didn’t step up, perhaps no one would.”

“Nearly three years have passed, and we now foster older children, having moved from kinship carers to full foster carers. The young man who started it all encouraged us to take this step when he was accepted into university. Our house is his family home: he returns during the holidays and has become a wonderful role model and supportive friend to every young person we care for.”

“The application process to become kinship carers was intrusive, but our assessing social worker was incredible, guiding us through every stage at a pace we were comfortable with. It’s easy to see why the process has to be so thorough - they’re trusting you with vulnerable children who need care and safety. The training has been fantastic: not only does it help you develop new skills, but what you learn can apply to your own children too. It opens your eyes and changes how you see things.”

“The Barnsley Fostering community is amazing. Support is always just a phone call away. Our supervising social worker is there for us at every step, and there’s a whole family of other foster carers who truly understand what you’re experiencing. You can always ask for advice or simply chat with someone who gets it. Events are a real highlight: carers and children come together, and it feels like an extended family.”

“Watching our foster son grow has been an incredible journey. He went from leaving school and not wanting further education to enjoying college, applying for university, and excelling there - something he never thought possible. He has faced his challenges, embraced new opportunities, and his future looks bright. We’ve seen him learn to drive and pass his test, organise get-togethers at our house, and even introduce us to his girlfriend. He has grown from an awkward teen into a confident young adult with strong values and a great sense of humour. He sees us as family, and Connie is his “borrowed mum”. He is truly part of our family. What makes us proudest is that every Thursday evening, while at university, he phones Connie for a long chat to catch up - he has never missed a week. Those calls are special and mean the world to us.”

“Fostering has changed how we view behaviour in young people and adults alike. We’re more patient now, and the training has helped us understand that there’s always a reason behind a child’s behaviour. It has taught us to question, listen, and grow.”

“If you’re thinking about fostering, just do it. There’s nothing to lose by enquiring or applying, and you can always change your mind. It’s important to consider what’s right for you and for the young person you may care for; if it’s not a good fit, it’s better to say so - for everyone’s sake. But if you do go ahead, you’ll find love, laughter, and lasting friendships with other carers. It’s a support network that’s there for you, whether you need advice, a chat, or a shoulder to lean on. The team at Barnsley Fostering is fantastic too.” 

“Foster carers come from all backgrounds and walks of life, and every single one is needed. You are needed. We might not be able to change the whole world, but through fostering we can transform a child’s life - giving them a home, the love they deserve, and hope for a brighter future.”

Daniel and Gemma's story 

Meet Gemma and Daniel - they've been fostering together since 2017 and have welcomed nearly 20 children into their home over the years. Now, they're sharing what it’s really like, and how being part of a Fostering Friendly workplace has made all the difference.

"I have been a foster carer, along with my wife Gemma and our son, since 2017. Over the past eight years, we have cared for almost 20 children, providing support ranging from a few days to a few years. The role is challenging but incredibly rewarding - knowing that you’ve been able to make a positive impact on the lives of children in need, even when caring for them on an emergency or short-term basis."

"Because of the nature of the role, you take on additional responsibilities and must complete further training to ensure you have the skills to provide the best possible care. I initially thought this would be difficult to manage alongside my job as an Engineer within the Highways Service. However, since the Council became a Fostering Friendly employer, balancing work, family, and fostering commitments has thankfully become much easier. The Council provides me with additional support and leave, which enables me to attend training and carry out fostering-related duties."

"My manager is understanding about the need to take leave at short notice, and we have flexible working arrangements so I can attend important events in our fostering children’s lives. Being able to use Fostering Friendly leave for things like training - when I previously had to use annual leave - has made a big difference. These days can also be used to attend events for the children in our care, such as birthdays, school plays, and key transition moments."

"While fostering has its challenges, the support offered through the Council’s Fostering Friendly status allows me to provide children with the highest level of care within a nurturing family unit, while still managing my work commitments."

Kim's story 

Meet a foster carer who followed her heart – after always knowing she wanted to work with children, she found her purpose in fostering. Twenty-five years on, she’s cared for children with a wide range of needs, built lasting bonds, and become part of a close-knit support network.

"I’ve always wanted to work with children, and fostering seemed like the perfect way to do that. I had a strong feeling that I could give children a loving home and help them grow and thrive in a happy family environment."

"The idea of making a difference in their lives was what really drew me in. The application process was straightforward, and I felt supported right from the start. I had all the help I needed, including the pre-Skills to Foster training and really supportive social workers who were there for me every step of the way."

"There have been so many moments that have made me proud as a foster carer. I think of all the children I’ve cared for over the years, including a mum and baby placement and children with special educational needs or disabilities. Watching these children thrive and achieve, and seeing their smiles, fills me with pride. It’s especially rewarding to work as a team, supporting family time and enabling children to connect with grandparents and siblings."

"Being part of the fostering community has made a big difference to my experience. The Mockingbird programme is a fantastic support network – everyone in our constellation supports each other, and we work together as a team. We have regular support group meetings, and we’re always there to offer advice and encouragement to one another."

"Over the 25 years I’ve been fostering, I’ve taken part in all the training that’s been available and have learned so much from it. I’ve gained new skills by caring for children of all ages, including mother and baby placements, and I’ve specialised in fostering children with special needs and complex health requirements. This is the part of fostering I love the most."

"If I were to give any advice to someone thinking about becoming a foster carer, I’d say it is hard work, but it’s worth every bit of effort. When you see children thriving and achieving in a safe, happy, and secure home, it’s the most rewarding feeling you can imagine."

Bex's story 

Meet Bex - she knew she had the patience and skills to support teenagers and wanted to give children in care a loving home. As a single carer without nearby family, she’s leaned on the support of the fostering community, especially her Mockingbird network. Now, she’s sharing her journey so far – from the first steps of training to the proudest moments of seeing a young person grow in confidence.

“I became a foster carer because I wanted to give children in care a loving home. I felt I had the right skills and patience - especially when it came to supporting teenagers - and I believed I could truly help them thrive."

“When it came time to apply, the process took about six months. I was assigned an assessing social worker, and before my assessment began, I took part in a pre-Skills to Foster training course. That training turned out to be genuinely valuable, giving me a solid foundation for what was to come.”

“One of the proudest moments for me as a foster carer has been seeing the child I care for grow in confidence. Watching that transformation is something I’ll always cherish.”

“As a single carer without family nearby and only a small circle of friends, I’ve come to rely heavily on the support around me. Being part of a Mockingbird family has been especially important - that network has been absolutely crucial in helping me continue my fostering journey.”

“Personally, fostering has helped me develop a deep understanding of every stage of a child’s life, from babies all the way to adulthood. I’ve gained knowledge that’s essential for caring for children in care, particularly since their backgrounds can be truly heartbreaking. I feel equipped to guide and support them, helping them work through the psychological challenges they might face.”

“If someone is thinking about becoming a foster carer, my advice is: go for it, but be ready to give it your all. The commitment is big, but so are the rewards.”

Amy and Stephen's story

Meet Amy and Stephen - they decided to start fostering because, as a placement worker, Amy wanted to do even more for the children she saw in need. When they found themselves moving into a home with extra space, the timing felt perfect. Now, they’re sharing their experience so far - the challenges, the joys, and everything in between!

What first drew you to fostering?

"I was first drawn to fostering after working as a placement broker for a neighbouring local authority. Seeing the number of children needing safe and secure homes, and the limited number of carers available - especially for older children - really shocked me.

“I would come home some days and talk to Stephen, wishing we could take in a child ourselves, particularly when we were struggling to find carers for them. Stephen kept saying, 'Well, let’s do it, let’s find out more about it all.' I knew then that fostering was something I wanted to consider once we moved house and had extra space."

How did you find the application process?

"The application process was brilliant, and we felt at ease throughout the whole thing. I think this is really important, as so much of your personal life is explored.

“Natalie, who was our assessing social worker, took the time to really get to know us and our family, and made us feel incredibly safe when discussing sensitive subjects and information. She worked around our schedule so that we could complete meetings and assessments at times that suited our family. We had in-person meetings and Teams calls in the evenings once our children were in bed, which made the whole process feel much more relaxed, and she got [to know] the real ‘us’."

What has your experience been like so far?

"Our first 18 months as foster carers have been incredible. We have supported six children already, all of whom have been very different placements, ranging from 10 months old to 13 years old.

“We have laughed, we have cried (a lot of happy tears), we have given a thousand hugs, and we have built the trust of some of the most vulnerable young people.

“To become that person they rely on, who is always going to be there for them when they need you, and to see their face light up when they see you at the end of the school day - that feeling is just amazing."

How have your birth children found becoming a foster family?

"It has been lovely to see how our own children have blossomed throughout our fostering journey, especially our eldest, who is now six. He speaks so positively about his experience, especially at school, and loves to tell people why we foster and how he helps the children who come to join our family. He has become such a considerate and caring young boy.

“A little note from my six-year-old son about what he enjoys most about being part of a fostering family: ‘I like new boys and girls coming to our home. Sometimes they are really scared and upset, but I like to show them where things are in our house. I choose them some toys and help my mum decorate their room. I like to play with them and help them feel happy living with our family.’"

Are there any memorable fostering moments that stand out to you?

"One of the most memorable moments was taking one of our foster children on her first holiday abroad. The excitement and being able to share that experience with her was so heartwarming, and that memory will stay with us forever.

“Another memory that makes us feel incredibly proud is from our recent placement. The girls, aged eight and 13, came to us in September and shared that they had never had a nice Christmas and felt very apprehensive about the whole festive period. Seeing their faces on Christmas morning as they came downstairs and opened presents they had put on their lists to Santa was incredibly emotional for us all, and they were so grateful.”

What would you say to someone who is considering fostering?

"I would encourage anyone considering becoming a foster carer to take the leap.

“It is the most rewarding thing I have ever done, and I can’t imagine not being a foster carer now. Even during the tough times, seeing how much your help and support mean to these children makes it all worth it. The support you receive is second to none, and the fostering community is incredibly welcoming and supportive. You will never be alone on your journey.

“I have definitely become much more patient and more aware of how children are feeling on a deeper level, which has positively influenced our own parenting. Stephen has grown in confidence when working with professionals and understanding that things can change quickly within a placement.”

Shirley's story 

Meet Shirley- Shirley has been fostering for Barnsley Council for eight years and describes herself as “as quite level headed, resourceful, fun-loving and straight talking”.  We caught up with Shirley and asked her to share her experience of being part of the fostering community in Barnsley. Here is Shirley’s story in her own words.

“Foster children have been a part of our wider family for years, as my sister and brother-in-law fostered. It was something I’d thought about a lot, so when my personal circumstances changed, I decided to go for it and [her fostering application] was approved in 2016.”

“It was Valentine's Day when my first child joined our family, she was quite a character and I jokingly called her My Funny Little Valentine. She used to laugh when I often pointed out that most people got chocolates and flowers on Valentine's Day, but instead I got my 11 year old ‘Funny Little Valentine’, and I wouldn’t have had it any other way! She stayed with me for almost two and a half years.”

“My next adventure was quite a challenge, a four-year-old boy who was a ball of energy and stress. He’d found it hard to settle in numerous previous placements, but when I met him and got to know him a little, I fell in love with him forever. Over a period of six months, I worked on building up a relationship with him. I wanted it to be his idea to come and live with me.”

“My current adventure arrived on my birthday in 2021. She was also just four years old...She arrived having no idea how to be herself, it was like walking her out of a dark room and putting her into a bright, sunny garden and she’d absolutely no idea what to do!  That was my mission, to show her how good it was to be her, the fun she could have and most importantly, how to use her voice!”

Nicola and Steve's story

Meet Nicola and Steve- they’ve provided emergency and respite foster care to local children for 11 years. We spoke to Nicola and Steve to learn about the support they have received from Barnsley Council. Here are Nicola and Steve in their own words:

“We’ve had a really positive experience of working with Barnsley Fostering. Our social workers have done everything to make it work, and have always accommodated our needs, giving us flexibility such as the option to provide respite placements.

There’s also been great communication; any issues we’ve had have been sorted out quickly – they work really hard."

“In any career you want an opportunity to progress, and that’s been made possible for [us]. Training and upskilling is important to us – we both like learning and are naturally curious, and it’s all been so easily available.

We’ve learned about therapeutic parenting, and it’s been so interesting to see how a child’s brain develops. There are always opportunities to learn new things. We are lifelong learners!"

Jon's story 

Meet Jon- a long term foster carer for Barnsley. We asked Jon to tell us about fostering, in his own words. Here’s what he told us about fostering as a single person, the magic of seeing children in his care grow, and how he works together with birth families.

“I’m a long-term single foster carer, which means I look after the child or young person until they reach adulthood. Being a long-term foster carer is a bit different; all plans are medium to long term, such as building up skills for young people to grow up and achieve their ambitions and develop good relationships with their schools, as well as their family members where this is possible.

It’s great to see the change in the child in my care. I invest a lot of time in his hobbies – we go swimming and I take him to football training.”

“It’s challenging, just like the responsibility of caring for anybody, and you’ve got to enjoy spending time with people.

“Although I'm a ‘corporate parent’, to the kids I’m ‘just Jon’. This is how I’m often introduced by [the young people]! This helps reassure their family members that I’m not there to replace them, just to provide that care they need.

“You need to have a realistic expectation of the young person and put the hours in – I learn something new every day! We are currently learning how to play guitar together.

It’s important to support them to develop their own identity, and it’s great to see the change in them as they grow in confidence.”